Not long after the creation of Poops of New York, Sam Josephs, the young man behind the site, sent me a Facebook message and requested his own HONY portrait. “Sure Sam,” I wrote back, “I’m sure we could do that.” But then I forgot about it, and a couple weeks passed by. Then I got this letter:
Dear HONY,
We shall not, nay, cannot continue playing this game of sorts. I must admit that it was I that started playing this match of tactical checkers. It was I that first enticed you with a photographic collection of excrement in a reflection of your own creation and in your own honor in an attempt to gain your courtesy. Then it was your move, and you played quite well. You thought it clever to share my shrine to you with the populous, your first move. As you planned it brought me into the piercing spotlight of fame, that as some may know too well is forever fleeting and shan’t stay in one place too long, much like your heart. It gained me followers far and wide overnight with which I delighted over, and it was you that gave me this pleasure of recognition. And then the cat and mouse game begins. I thought i might send you a message explaining my desires, I did not and do not beat around the bush nor try to hide my true intention, I made it clear to you what I so desperately desired. You replied in a cryptic message instructing me to message you through a different device, and like a servant to a master I did as I was told. Then I played the waiting game, and as days began to fade to nights, and the sands of time continue to fall where they may, I began to lose hope. I thought I might try to contact you one last time, and again no reply. I had fallen into your trap; you gave me the gift of notoriety knowing full well I would grow fond of it and crave more, then when I tried to attain what I craved so desperately, you shunned me. But alas, I accepted your unresponsiveness, it may have left a wound in my flesh, but as wounds do, it would heal with time. But then salt was thrown into this fresh wound when you took a picture of the man of the Halal cart right outside of my school while refusing to photograph me. This was the straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back, I swore my allegiance against you. I unliked you on the book of faces and had to purge my life of you. After weeks of reflection I believed I had recovered, but no, you decide to bring me again into this spotlight now burning my singed soul. I refuse to go on with this back and forth game, and I will make this my final plea, I want one thing and one thing alone. You and I both know what it is.
Take my Picture
Sincerely,
Samuel L Josephs IV
So when I visited HCHS last week, I finally granted Sam his wish. Here he is pictured with photographic assistant and fellow turd hunter, Anna. Sam can also be found in the far left of the HCHS group portrait, flicking off the camera. You can view Sam’s site at http://poopsofnewyork.tumblr.com/
is that
ethan reeder in the back
